Advice Column: Liar Liar

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friends

My friend is a pathological liar. It’s gotten so bad that I never know when he’s telling the truth anymore. He’ll lie about anything and everything, even super mundane things. Lately, it’s just becoming too exhausting. Is it worth saving this friendship?

WORDS | Manisha Josephraja

Just admit it, white lies are kind of fun. They have their place in social etiquette and within reason, they can sometimes get you out of incredibly uncomfortable situations. They can enhance just about any story, especially when used to build upon actual events. Lies can also be very tricky, and depending on their level of complexity, have the tendency to backfire.

Pathological liars, however, take lying to the next level, and in many cases it has become second nature. Pathological lying can also be indicative of greater problems, such as borderline personality disorder or narcissistic personality disorder. The foundation of any fulfilling relationship is trust, so without this, maintaining this friendship is not going to be an easy task. If this kind of behaviour is affecting your relationship negatively, which I suspect it has to be, maybe it’s time you make some decisions. You can either confront this person about the issue if this relationship is important to you, or decide to cut ties instead. You should never lie about important things to people you care about, there’s no excuse for that, except, well, being a shit person.

Basically, if you’re going to lie, try and make them somewhat believable and only tell them to strangers. Also, hope to Christ that you’ll never see this person again because your next encounter will be so awkward when you can’t remember which story you falsified. Is there really a difference between lying and just leaving imperative information out? Probably not, but I’m a big fan of the latter. I’m beginning to realise how my stance on lying is making me appear… your new Lena Dunham inspired haircut really suits you though, I swear.

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